a life vest and a whole lot of love

The week started off great for me, my husband was back from the states and we had plans to spend every second we could together. As I said goodbye at the door of our flat, he headed to work and I completed my morning routine of making coffee and lounging in front of my computer to read bloglovin'. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping away in true spring fashion and I was planning my assault on the day. Coffee downed: check. Blogs all read: check. To-do list for the day: check. Off I went through my day. I tried to check off my to-do list as fast as I could so I could watch the Boston Marathon.

If you know me in real life, you know I am a runner. I enjoy running (I know, I'm a little crazy!) and I enjoy watching my favorite athletes run. Two of my running idols, if you will, are Shalane Flanagan and Kara Goucher and they were competing on Monday. I was really excited to see how they'd do and couldn't wait to watch them battle it out through the marathon.

Little did I know what the Boston Marathon would bring- not all excitement and cheers, but watching that day also brought horror and pain. The scenes of the bombings looked like scenes from Iraq- not downtown Boston on a spring day. My heart ached as I watched the footage and my heart continues to ache for the aftermath and continued terror Boston is dealing with today. There aren't enough words in the world to speak what's in my heart and show how heavy this has been weighing on my mind. I am thinking of the families that have lost loved ones, families who are learning to live with a new reality of being maimed in a terror attack, people trying to answer the question of 'why?' My heart is heavy because I have through an attack, I've seen the horror, I've lost friends, and I know the road to recovery is long. They will never be the same. They will never forget.

Words often don't do emotions justice and my thoughts were disorganized and jumbled in my mind, so I did what I do best when I need to think clearly. I ran. I ran quietly through my town, up and down the hills, over the wooden bridge that makes my steps seem so loud, up the path past the farmers fields ripe with fresh manure and out through the tall grass of the river side. My steps were deliberate and shorter than normal, but I felt I moved with a purpose, to make sense of the events of late. I padded down the path and eventually made it back to my flat, home sweet home, where I felt so safe. I quickly noted I should work on not taking that for granted in the future.

I found myself in my sewing room itching to give my emotions an outlet. I don't often allow myself to create in the heat of emotion because it can be a little scary to let yourself go, not knowing what the end will produce. I felt much more calm after my run, so I let my heart guide me through the process of making. It felt good and was a much needed release of anxious energy.

I came up with a tribute mini quilt (it's about 12.5X12.5) for Boston I named 'to boston with love' and thought I'd share it with you.

to boston with love

detail on mini quilt

There are a million things I'd like to say about the events that have taken place thus far, but I'll save them for another post. How do you deal with tragedies like these? What's your go-to home 'therapy'? I'd love for you to join me in crafting something for Boston- it can be any medium... crayon, paper, fabric, whatever floats your boat.... Check out the Flickr Group I've created here: craft4boston Feel free to join and link what you've created!

I came across this Ted talk today via a friend on Facebook that made me smile, and dare I confess, cry a little. There is no question it has been a trying week for America, and I can guarantee each and every one of you could probably use a smile right now... and likely a hug to go along with it! Obviously I can't give all of you a hug, but I hope this will feel a little like a hug!

Life Vest Inside - Kindness Boomerang from Orly Wahba on Vimeo.

a serious matter.

got my ass on the treadmill this morning, and now after all is said and done, i feel much better... it's always easier to sit on the couch and watch food network when you have worked some of your fat for the day. ha.

so. back to the serious issue at hand. i really couldn't even keep count of how many times during my workout i thought, "what was i thinking?!" the culprit: my period. who feels good during these terrible days of the month in the first place? and then i think its a good idea to get back to working out in the middle of the mess. OMG. i have officially lost my mind. the rest of my body felt great- but the aching throbbing crampy feeling in my lower belly really put a damper on that high you get when you are exercising.

and let me say this in further disgust to whomever it is, likely a man, that designs pads: you suck. i really think that whoever the designer is needs to wear each one they design while working out and getting all fabulously sweaty, and subsequently chafed. thanks an f'in lot, buddy. no matter how thin, or utterly dri-weaved, or winged they make them, they are uncomfortable and let's face it, they always rub you the wrong way. ugh.

i'm in disgust with them. boo.

so there. my rant for the day. i'm feeling much better i got that all out. and i'm sure i just killed my measly readership to even further depths.

happy working out during your period!!

thinking thin.

but more importantly healthy! i am going to start working out again and since i don't have anyone to work out with in person, i am going to force myself to put my workouts on my blog everyday so i can be held accountable. there is no certain plan i'll be following other than one that gets me off my butt, onto the treadmill (or out the door) and makes me feel better! i haven't quite found a BIG goal to work towards, so the first milestone will be:

the copperas cove (my little town) jackrabbit run for hope. according to the countdown, there are only 33 days to go, so i certainly need to get myself in gear, or i'll be hobbling instead of running!

are any of you working out now? interested in starting? do you have a goal in mind you'd like to achieve?? i'd love to hear about it! tomorrow starts my working out routine... even the hubs is getting up extra early to hit the treadmill before work... lucky for me i don't have to get up so early!

have a hippity hoppity healthy night! i'll be back tomorrow with my first update... and some more fun stuff to share with you too!

runner's high

This morning I woke to a wonderful surprise the shining sun and a nice cool breeze. Autumn has officially snuck into our lives like a thief in the night; I’m just hoping she won’t be too quick to run away! I planned to get an early run in before the sun began warmed the air too much; making it feel wet with each laboring breath. Who knew I would be running in near-perfect conditions (if you ask me)? I laced up my running shoes, slid my iPod around my arm, and headed out the door. The first few steps will usually be a good determination of how my run is going to go, so I always pay very close attention. This morning’s first few steps were in a word: perfect. I could hear the thud of my feet bouncing on the pavement through my music, and the breeze was swirling around me making the leaves dance across the ground. It’s going to be a great day!

I love running through Saijo because the air feels so clean, and the views are incredible. One of my favorite runs here takes me across a bridge near the shipping yards, and has equally awesome views of the islands of the Seto Inland Sea and the mountains. There are always bright white cranes standing in the muck of the river bed, and the occasional elderly man close beside them digging for clams complete with a bucket a rubber boots. There are seemingly endless rows of tiny fishing boats bobbing on waves, with their nets anxiously awaiting their next cast, and the flags flapping in the breeze. The smell of fish is not one I’m particularly fond of, but the overall smell of the sea is such an interesting one, I have grown to truly enjoy it.

Once I finish crossing over the arching bridge, I am faced with a real treat you don’t always find on a city run; a heavily tree-lined path through a tiny park. It’s a joyous respite from the sun’s rays tickling my nose, with a dark aura; a dark, damp smell to match, and this morning the added smell of freshly cut hedges and a group of 20-or-so playing Bocce Ball. It was nice to see other smiling faces exercising in the early morning hours.

Any run in Saijo, especially when you are an American, is likely to turn some heads. I sometimes feel like quite a spectacle on my runs, but have learned to ignore that feeling, nod, and keep on going. I am sure I look fairly odd running along the country roads, looking at the beautiful flowers, both wild and in gardens, and enjoying the many shades of green of the rice fields which fade into the horizon. As odd as it may be to catch a glimpse of me running by, there are those who obviously find it quite intriguing. Some wave, some throw an occasional, “Hello!” my way, and some just stop to stare.

My favorite passersby are my fellow runners, few and far between, but a very welcomed sight. It seems, no matter the language you speak, runners have a way of speaking to each other as they pass. A smile, or hello, and the seemingly obligatory look of admiration lights up their face, and gives you a burst of adrenaline to keep you going just a little further.

Running for me is both something I do to stay healthy, but it’s also a nice quiet time for me to think about what my day may bring, or to reflect on what has been. The better I feel on a run, the more I am able to really let my mind think; some days I think more than others! When you head out the door for a run, you really never know what you may encounter, and I find that to be an exhilarating motivator to get up and get going.

I have quite a routine when it comes to run mornings, which most would find way too cumbersome just to go out and make yourself sweat, and ultimately hurt (in a good way, of course!) I have a favorite type of shorts that I now own in every color of the rainbow, and a myriad of old t-shirts that are worn to perfection that I always wear. Then there are the socks. Socks are a huge deal for anyone who is a runner. They have to be just the right fit, the right material, and the right thickness to be the perfect socks. I have more running socks than I know what to do with, and they are all a little bit different depending on the run I’m heading out on. I always wear sunglasses when I run, sun or no sun because I want to protect my eyes from road dirt, and the occasional bug that may come flying in.

The ultimate running equipment for me is my iPod. I don’t often leave home without it, especially when I’m going for a run. There is something wildly motivating about listening to upbeat music while you are working out. I am always looking for new songs that are ‘run-worthy’; I can never seem to have enough! The current iPod I use for running has been my ‘running buddy’ for the past two years now, and I don’t look forward to the day she stops working- I had a scare last week, but I got her back up and running. (Score one for me!!)

I’m sure many of you are not at all interested in running, and would much rather do anything but run. I totally understand that, because I myself have not always enjoyed running. People who know me well usually have a hard time believing this, but it’s true. Learning about the health benefits of running, and how it can help you stay on a schedule, and lighten your moods made me give running a serious chance about 8 years ago. I ended up enjoying it so much; I’m still running to this day. If you aren’t a runner, or would never want to, I would challenge you to add a nice long walk to your daily routine. It’s a simple thing that everyone can do to make him or herself a little bit healthier. It may seem like a burden at first, but in the long run, you’ll be much healthier and likely happier you took a few minutes out of your day for some exercise!